How to Overcome Your Fear of Self-Promotion
The hardest part of creating anything is having the guts to share it. And the real question — the one you might wrestle with often — is: how do you keep showing up, day after day, despite how cringey it feels? How do you keep promoting your work despite the awkwardness, the discomfort, and the way it sometimes feels like a small humiliation ritual?
The answer is practice.
Over time, you’ll learn that self-promotion isn’t about being loud or salesy. It’s about building habits that make sharing your work feel natural, even when it feels uncomfortable.
I’ve published thousands of pieces of content, built a platform of more than 250,000 followers, and tested what really works when it comes to getting your work seen. What I’ve learned is this: you can face your fear of self-promotion, and you can do it in a way that feels authentic.
These are the lessons I lean on — and they can apply to anything you want to bring into the world: a book, a product, a service, even just an idea.
You’re not marketing. You’re storytelling.
For years, I thought good marketing meant following formulas and ending every post with “link in bio.” Maybe you’ve tried that too — and maybe it wore you down.
Here’s a more effective solution: Storytelling.
Storytelling works because it gives people something to carry with them — a line, a feeling, a memory. If someone finishes your post and thinks I want more of this, you’ve already won.
So the next time fear creeps in, remind yourself: good marketing doesn’t feel like marketing. It feels like connection. All you have to do is tell a story.
The secret to telling stories that spread
If a story doesn’t land, it’s usually because you broke the one rule all stories live or die by:
A good story shows what changed.
Here’s the simple framework you can use:
Beginning → Who you were and what you believed.
Pivot → What happened that forced you to change.
End → Who you are now because of that change and what you believe today.
Throughline → The takeaway you want your audience to leave with.
The “what happened” is interesting, but the internal shift — the change you went through — is where the real connection lies.
When you reveal your doubts, realizations, and transformation, your story becomes more than your own. It becomes theirs too.
There are no wrong choices
Maybe you’ve scrolled through your camera roll after a day of filming and felt overwhelmed. From one afternoon, you could share ten different stories. Maybe none of them sound that compelling to you. Which one should you choose?
Here’s the truth: there are no wrong choices.
The moment you commit to an idea, it becomes the right one. What matters isn’t whether others like it — what matters is that you see it through.
When you feel paralyzed, here’s what helps:
Take the pressure off. Don’t choose when you’re anxious. Wait until you’re calm and clear-headed.
Follow your heart. Don’t choose the story you think will perform. Choose the story you actually want to tell.
Repetition isn’t boring. It’s where creativity lives.
If you’re afraid of repeating yourself, here’s the truth: repetition works.
When I promoted my memoir, I spent 30 days straight creating content. Every single post had the same call to action: Subscribe to my Substack.
The formats varied — voiceovers, updates, long-form posts, takeaways. Some went viral. Most didn’t. But by the end of the month, I had gained thousands of new subscribers.
Repetition pushed me past the obvious. Once you’ve told the easy version, you’re forced to find new angles. That’s where creativity and connection live.
Fear is part of the process
We’re all afraid people won’t like what we create. We’re afraid our old classmates will cringe. We’re afraid of looking less smart or less capable.
These fears are real. But fear is just energy you need to face.
Here are a few odd strategies you can try:
Hit publish with your eyes closed, just to get it over with.
Play mind games: If I don’t market this, I’m not serious about my work.
Use envy as fuel: If they can win, so can I.
Bribe yourself: Post this now, and you can take the rest of the afternoon off.
You have to love it
Here’s the truth: if you don’t care enough to put yourself out there, you might not care enough about what you’re creating.
That’s the hard truth I had to face. When I knew I was on the right track — with my memoir Lonely Girl and with my Substack — I felt excited to share them, even when it was uncomfortable.
So ask yourself: are you promoting the right thing? Do you love it enough to risk the discomfort?
Because in the end, fear of self-promotion is only a feeling — uncomfortable, but tolerable when you believe in what you’re sharing.
Your story matters. The right people want to hear it.
Questions for Reflection
What do you care about enough to risk feeling uncomfortable for?
When have you shared something that felt vulnerable but deeply true?
Are you promoting the right thing — the thing you actually believe in?
What’s one small way you can show up today, even if it feels cringey?
Your story is too important to stay untold. My community, Personal Brand Accelerator, can help you turn your ideas into content that really makes a difference — and build the kind of presence that attracts opportunities, clients, and community. Join today and start putting your story to work.
